The Waiting Game

Often times I struggle with living the "Christian" life and living...well "of the world." For example, I go to church every Sunday, I don't have sex, but I'll jam Trey Songz or Beyonce to and from church. I'll cuss you out, right after church. I often envy others who are blessed with things I've prayed for. Then I realized, GOD ISNT GOING TO BLESS THAT. You can't be on the Lord's side when it's convient for you, it's all or nothing, and then your blessings will come. It's like when your talking to someone, and you really like them, and you want to take that next step with them, but then they mess up. They do something so bad, so hurtful, that makes you reconsider being with them. You're not going to reward inconsistency, and neither is God. Being godly isn't easy. I've been called boring or grandma because I rather sleep so I can go to church the next morning, rather than going out. I'll tell people I'm celibate and they'll ask why...like why not? You get your heart broke every other week sleeping with different guys thinking they're the one when they're not. Maybe you should try celibacy too. Lol I promise you the right person who appreciates your decision will find you. No, it might not be as fast as when you was given it up, but at least you'd know that person is here for you (in most cases, not all the time so be aware. Some guys are getting it from other places but that's another blog post. *sips tea*). I feel like who cares what other people say about your life style? That's something I've always struggled with because ive tried so hard to live right and people would still judge and make up things about me just by who I hang with, support, or my number of twitter/IG followers. It's so stupid that people feel like in order to have a lot of support, or have a lot of people like you, there must be something wrong or She must be a bop. God knows that I'm living right, and he's letting me into heaven. Not anyone else. One of the things I'm currently struggling with is patience. I don't have any. When things don't go my way I get so upset and just shut down. I realize that God's timing may not always match up with our timing but it's always perfect timing. Sometimes we just have to play the waiting game.